Everyone has some sort of criteria of what they do and don’t want in a relationship, and May-December relationships are no different. Most young women who date older men are looking for someone who’s mature, confident, financially stable, and can look after them both physically and emotionally. And that’s on top of good looks, a sense of humor, and all those other things that women generally tend to favor in a partner.
Most older men in May-December relationships also have their own list of requirements when it comes to finding the perfect younger woman, but there’s one thing that both men and women value in a relationship—an active sex life.
A recent survey conducted by a U.K. dating agency found that a whopping 80% of the participants wouldn’t bother staying in a relationship if they weren’t having sex regularly. What’s more, 80% admitted that they think it’s impossible to maintain a committed, long-term relationship without sex.
So, how much sex is enough in a relationship? According to 65% of the female survey respondents and 69% of the men, “several times a week” is sufficient for sustaining a healthy relationship. Considering these numbers, it’s not surprising that no sex is a major deal breaker—68% of the participants said they wouldn’t be interested in a serious relationship with someone who wants to stay abstinent.
Sex is an especially hot topic for May-December relationships. If you’re a younger woman who’s in a relationship with a much older man, a lot of people tend to wonder about how the age difference impacts your sex life. But the truth is that not all men get impotent with age—many of them are still very much able (and more than willing) to meet your needs in the bedroom.
Whether there’s a stark age difference or not, sex is clearly in an important part of a relationship. But that doesn’t mean abstinence is by any means wrong, or that you’ll never be in a long-term relationship without giving it up. Sex should never be the be all and end all of your relationship.
The trick is to find someone who’s on the same page as you, be it holding off on sex or getting it on every other day. As long as you both want the same things out of the relationship, and those expectations are voiced early on, there’s no reason you can’t make it work.
What do you think: Would no sex be a relationship deal breaker for you, or do you think you can still be in a serious relationship and remain abstinent?
Young, C., “Living without sex is not an option, a new survey reveals,” SundayWorld.com, April 10, 2014; http://goo.gl/7AL9qe.