Marriage is always a hot topic in May-December relationships. A lot of the times, older men have no interest in marriage because they’ve either tried already (and failed), or they just don’t want to be legally committed to settling down. But what happens when a casual relationship turns into a long-term one? What happens when all of a sudden, marriage isn’t such a far-fetched idea?
A recent study out of the U.K. found that women in general expect a marriage proposal about three years into a relationship—three years and four months, to be exact. And that’s not all they want. Of the 2,000 unmarried women surveyed, at least half said they want the proposal to be so incredibly romantic that they cry. Other popular requirements for the perfect marriage proposal included being asked in private while on vacation, and being asked after you’ve had a few conversations about marriage, although they want the actual marriage proposal to be a pre-planned surprise.
Gentleman, if you think you can get away with just an ordinary marriage proposal, think again. About a quarter of the women said that if the proposal wasn’t what they wanted, they would turn it down.
So, when it comes to sugar daddy/sugar baby relationships, what’s the protocol? Because these types of relationships aren’t like traditional ones, it’s even more important to know where you both stand with regards to marriage. The first thing you need to make sure of when you enter a May-December relationship is that you both put all your cards on the table from the get-go—make it clear how you feel about marriage.
Of course, there’s always the chance that one or both of you can change your mind, especially if your relationship evolves from a casual one to a more committed one. But try to always keep the lines of communication open so that you’re not caught off guard if and when the topic comes up.
If nothing else, this serves as a fair warning for all you older gentleman who are in a May-December relationship with a younger woman—even if she says now that she’s OK with not getting married, don’t be surprised if three years in she starts hinting for a ring. And ladies, if you’re dating an older man who’s not into marriage, but you find yourself being drawn to the idea, don’t be afraid to bring the topic up. It’s better to say it now and get shot down than invest three or four years into a relationship that will only end in heartbreak.
What do you think: How long should a relationship last before you get married?
Winter, K., “Women expect a marriage proposal three years and four months into a relationship – and they want a ring worth at least ₤1,000,” Daily Mail web site, November 15, 2013; http://goo.gl/hG4efS.